Can you help us support families in need this Christmas?

Every year Spurgeons helps families who are struggling by offering parenting support. Their stories vary, but can often involve poverty, domestic abuse, mental health problems, or SEND. 

Our staff help change the lives of those families and alleviate their struggles. 

Mel's story

After suffering years of domestic abuse at the hands of her husband, Mel needed help. Despite her husband leaving, she felt plunged into chaos. ‘Suddenly, the source of coercive control was gone,’ Mel recalls. ‘For the kids, it was like taking the lid off a pressure cooker—they rebelled, argued constantly, and wouldn’t listen to me at all.’

Her oldest daughter had frequent meltdowns and was excluded from secondary school 22 times over two years. There were ongoing tensions that affected the other two children as well. Meanwhile, Mel was working three jobs to make ends meet and trying to recover after years of abuse. She felt anxious, unable to concentrate, and overwhelmed amidst the constant shouting and arguing at home. ‘I was exhausted,’ she says, ‘and there was no end in sight.’

Fortunately, Mel eventually found support through Spurgeons, where she began weekly sessions with Family Support Worker Leonie. We provided Mel with the practical, compassionate help she so needed. ‘Leonie was positive and kind,’ Mel recalls. ‘She was like a friend. She listened, understood, and stood by me. She believed in me until I believed in myself again—she’d say, “You can do this!"’

‘Each week, Leonie would ask me what had gone well and what hadn’t, then offer practical suggestions on how to prevent situations from escalating,’ explains Mel. ‘I tried her ideas, and to my relief they worked. Home life is still a bit of a battleground but with Leonie’s help and guidance I can manage it so much better now.’

After just ten sessions, Mel had the confidence, tools, and skills to manage her complex parenting situation and her home was much calmer. ‘We can actually sit and eat a meal together in peace,’ Mel says. The family even managed a holiday with friends without any issues. ‘Parenting can still be tiring,’ Mel admits, ‘but I’ve learned not to worry about things that might not happen. I know how to stay calm and prevent tensions from flaring. If the kids have an issue I can’t deal with immediately, I explain and say, “Let’s park it, and we’ll come back to it when I have time.” And that really works. The help from Spurgeons and Leonie has been amazing—it’s been a lifeline, and I’m so grateful to everyone involved.’

Kate's story

Kate was overwhelmed trying to cope with her son's additional needs as well as her own anxiety. 'I felt like I was drowning,' she says, 'the stress was constant and I didn't know how to find a way out.'

When Kate reached out to us, her life began to change. She attended Spurgeons counselling, which was tailored to her needs, and started using new techniques to cope with her anxiety. Through parenting support she learnt to understand her son's needs and gained effective parenting techniques that created a calmer environment at home. 

From there, Kate flourished. Her son became more comfortable in public settings. And, with newfound confidence, Kate noticed a shift in her household—her children started pitching in and helping around the house. For the first time in a long while, Kate experienced moments of peace and clarity.

But Kate's journey didn’t stop there. Empowered by her progress, she took a courageous step towards independence and began learning to drive. This newfound freedom is paving the way for her return to work, allowing her to dream of a brighter future for her family.